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09 Apr

A lot of women told me they felt guilty about having a high-school boyfriend because it just wasn’t what you were “supposed” to do as a freshman.

When I asked them exactly what they were supposed to be doing instead, no one had a concrete answer.

” so many times that my face starts to hurt), or do I fall back on the familiar?

One Princeton junior told me that, during her first three months in college, she stayed in her room every Friday and Saturday night.

During their first trip home, freshmen have to decide whether they stick it out with their first love, or succumb to what is known as the “Turkey Drop”— the phenomenon of high-school couples breaking up when they come home for their first Thanksgiving.

Much of my own freshman year in college was determined by one recurring scene. She tells me her plans for the night – maybe a sorority party or a pregame in a friend’s room – and asks me if I want to come along.

Did they take advantage of their first three months in college, or did they lose out by spending too much time on Skype?By November, however, most freshmen have gotten over the worst of their homesickness.The “Turkey Drop” happens in part because freshmen realize they no longer need the safety blanket of their high school significant other. Christopher Thurber, a psychologist at Phillips Exeter Academy, going home for Thanksgiving – being surrounded by people they love – can actually help freshmen to get over their homesickness.She knew she was missing out on important college experiences, but there was still something that made her stay with him for the first few months.“First semester of freshman year, you don’t have that many real friends, so when my high-school boyfriend would show up, I would be like, ‘Yes, here is someone I trust, that I can actually tell things to,’” another junior said.“He was someone who would just instantly understand what was happening with me emotionally.